When Is Close, Too Close for Comfort?

When is Close, too Close it qualifies as Pesky?

It's all about balancing the act. As an old adage goes "Anything in excess is bad". Nope. That saying isn't exclusive to weight watchers. It applies to all things in life. So when does something as wonderful as Love become excessively annoying? When it takes up too much personal space the word "space" already loses it's meaning.

I tried explaining that to a few men ages 25 to 35 years old, either married, engaged or in a serious relationship and they all raised their arms in agreement. "Our wives/girlfriends/fiancee/partners can be pesky sometimes. They take up a lot of our personal space. We don't like that. We hate that". All of them said so at one point during the interview.

But right around the time we were to write their names down they all turned yellow and started giving out names such as John Smith, John Doe, Doe Smith, John John, Batman, George Clooney, Brad Pitt, .... Angelina Jolie.

And when it was time for a group picture they all ran away.

So I tried explaining the same thing to a group of 15 year old male virgins instead, and none of them said they'd mind. Of course none of them have ever been with a real pesky woman other than their mothers. But you'd be amazed at how a guy in his mid 20's to mid 30's can be very similar to his mid teens counterpart. The point being, a pesky wife, girlfriend, fiancee, FUBU, sex toy or whatever, brings a guy back to the days when he was 15, living with his mom, and didn't have a say in anything important. Not that they don't appreciate their moms' effort. They do. It's just that if she only decided to give half the attention in terms of monetary support and freedom, surely more 15 year old male, virgin, nerds, would be happier.

Space to a guy is as important as his balls. Which means, it's very, very important. Just think of how a typical guy sits, legs wide open, taking up twice the space his frame would normally take-up. Why does he need that much space? You guessed it right ... It's his balls that need the necessary wiggle room. Take that away, and discomfort would creep-up on him.

Married or Committed guys are no different. They need just as much space. They need just as much room. They need night-outs with the Boys. They need morning-offs to play golf. They need that quiet time as they read their Sunday paper. They need everyone to keep away when they're watching their favorite game on TV ...... Unless you have beer, a few sandwiches, and chips to bring over, trust that they don't need women around.

Selfish as it may seem, a guy's "Me Time" doesn't take up an entire day, an entire weekend, or most of the week. The space men generally need are simple patches of "ME TIME". Their Male Territory Time. It's a time that's healthy for these men.

They need to be their friends to re-energize. They need to play games with their pals, so they can feel like boys once more. They need their sports show, just for that extra boost of adrenalin. But what do those "Me Time" give women in return? Just like their 15 year old Virgin counterparts, it's a good way to keep the boys calm, controlled, and appreciative of your presence. ...... At least that's what I heard when I interviewed a group of 85 year old, male retirees, .... but that's another story, for another time.

by: John

'06 September 2008

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